11.73 things I still do from my childhood.

I am growing up and older but I have come to realize that there are still things I like to do that are the same from when I was a kid. Remember those days before car payments, concerns about our mid section and mortgages? It was a life full of carefree fun. There are moments now that I find myself doing stuff that I use to do as a kid and loving it just as much. Some of the fun stuff I do is so much easier now because no one expects it. In other words, I get away with it because it seems like I made a mistake, when in reality it was totally planned. Here are the 11.73 things I still like to do from my childhood.

1. I like to trap people in revolving doors. You may be asking yourself, when was the last time you did this? I did this in Oregon just last week 11/19/09 at 3:57 to be exact. There was a guy going through the hotel revolving door and I made it look like I went through and my suitcase didn’t. It instantly stopped the door and he kind of ran into it. He looked at me and I just said, “Sorry,” he said “no problem.” Precisely planned event excellently executed.
2. I go around twice in revolving doors. Watch the movie “Elf” and there is a great scene involving this activity. No more to say here.
3. Kicking loose rocks down the street, just to see how far they will go and where they will randomly change course. I do this quite often when I go for my walks in the morning. Very fun, try it.
4. Don’t forget scrunching through huge piles of autumn leaves. Man that sound is so cool. You can pretend you are walking on potato chips, crackers or dried up bones. It all depends on the mood you are in.
5. Puddles! Oh, and the more adult version of veering slightly in the road for a puddle while driving my F150 to make a big whoooshy splash. I just wish we lived in a place where it rains a little more. There was one time, about 2 years ago, I took the kids out to a road that floods and we drove through water that was almost mid tire. So much fun.
6. Every time I come to double doors without a bar in the middle, I throw both of them open at the same time and strut through. The sad part is you don’t see to many of these so when you do don’t let the opportunity pass you up.
7. I pretend I use the force to open up automatic doors. This is as close as I am going to get to being a Jedi. When I feel like a Jedi Master I will use the same “force power” to change red light to green.
8. I snap my fingers instead of use the force to make the doors open. When I’m not in Jedi mode and want to be in my mafia crime boss mode I will snap my finger to open a door. It makes me feel like I am the Godfather. If you really want to enhance this feeling, snap your fingers to open a door at a dollar store with $30 bucks in your pocket. You feel like a millionaire.
9. I’m a fan of balancing on curbs instead of walking on the street. You can pretend all kinds of things. I love when my dog walks behind me while balancing on a curb.
10. Every once in awhile I will go up the stairs on all fours. This one is hard to do when people are watching. It is a lot of fun.
11. I still catch myself trying not to step on cracks on the sidewalk or on certain color tiles in the airport. We just went to a mall not to long ago and I did this. I will often do this in airports. I will choose a color and have to step on it, if not I will fall into the hot lava. This is so much fun and no one knows you are doing it. It is my way of making something mundane into something new and exciting.
11.73 I will try to hold my breath until something happens. For example if I am sitting in an airport I will try to hold my breath until someone who is wearing a blue…

11.73 thing I have to have closer on.

I need closer. I need to know that an event has been packaged, wrapped and put in the mail…closer. I think it started when I was a kid and use to watch the Bugs Bunny cartoon. At the end of the cartoon Porky the Pig would come on and say, “That all folks!” I new there was no more coming my way. When I give my intern a job I don’t want to think about it again till the job is done, otherwise my brain will not let it go. Now if there are any questions about the job I am happy to answer them, but please don’t keep coming back to me day after day telling me the job isn’t done or asking me the same questions. CLOSER, you get it! I am sure there are many of you have the same thing running through you. So here are the 11.73 thing I have to have closer on.

1. When I am drying my garments I need to hear the buzz sound at the end of the dry cycle. I can feel that the clothes are dry but I’m not sure if there is a cool down cycle. Maybe, just maybe the buzz sound somehow releases the magic drying fairy to go on to their next job at someone else house. Without that buzz sound they are just stuck there wondering if we will turn the drier on for the last few minutes.
2. At the end of a phone call I have to hear good by, talk to you later, call you back, out…something. Otherwise I just figured they hung up mad or our conversation isn’t done. Then I don’t know if to call them back or just wait to see if they call me back. It turns into a confusing night mare of a phone call.
3. The last two bites of my dinner must end well. I will never give those two bites away. If there was a huge explosion in the house on one of those two bites it is just going to have to wait. Here is what I mean by “end well.” The tortilla, salsa and drink all need to be done within those last two bites. I cannot have a glob of salsa left or a huge chunk of tortilla waiting in the wings. It’s all about timing and after 40 years at this I have gotten pretty good, I didn’t do this the first 4 years of eating.
4. I need to hear the flushing sound after I use the toilet. I don’t care if it is actual sound or recorded, I just need to hear it. I have no problem using a port-a-potty, visiting Mexico and Africa has trained me well. The problem occurs when there is no sound at the end of my business. I just don’t feel like I am done and things closed out well.
5. When I am drinking some refreshing beverage through a straw I want to hear that empty sound a drink makes right at the end. I don’t know what that sound is called, I just want to hear it. (Crazy confession.) There has been times when my wife has finished the drink and won the sound, I will go a put a little in the cup so I get that sound too…drink is done. If I am not using a straw, I don’t care about the sound.
6. When I drop off my amazing son or creative daughter off at school I need to see them walk away. I don’t want to look at them through the rear view mirror, I want to see them physically walking away from the car.
7. After speaking at a school or public event for pay, I want my check. I hate it when schools or business have to do the 30 day thing to get me paid out. I feel like I did my part, now you do yours.
8. When ever we leave the house and I am the last one out the front door, I need to hear the click sound that our door makes when you lock the dead bolt. For some reason that lets me know that the place is locked down and we are on our way. If I am not the last one out, I might ask, did you close the door…hard? We have never had any problems with a break in so I don’t know where this comes from, I just need to hear the sound.
9. When I send a text I want to see the “Message sent” mmm…message. I want to know that arrow is out of my quiver and is heading for it’s target. If for some reason I miss it I am always compelled to send it again. Usually I just have to tell myself, it’s never failed you in the past, why would it fail you now?
10. I have to say Amen at the end of my prayers. If I don’t, I get this strange feeling God is hanging in there wondering if I am done talking with him. I think this might go back to number 2. I can just picture Jesus looking around asking the angels, did Ray say Amen? Were we done? How did I miss that? I don’t want to ask him if he’s done because I’m God and I know everything…dang it.
11. I need to say the words, “You’re right, I’m sorry” to know the argument it over. This is a total joke wonderful wife. I shouldn’t of use this in my blog. You’re right, I’m sorry. That ends number eleven.
11.73 This has to be the strangest one of them all. After purchasing something at a department store, with a credit card only, I will return the pen to its home then I have to take my hand and ….